Indispensable People
Making the Gospel Accessible to people of ALL abilities so that they may know Christ, grow in Him, and serve Him with the gifts He has given them.
Indispensable People
FAQ: Stop Saying “Let Us Know” And Start Showing Up
We explore how to minister to the whole family impacted by disability, moving from surface-level kindness to practical, relational care. We share a story of a parent who found faith and a path to belonging through consistent support, respite, and a welcoming church.
• the gap between perceived and real disability-friendliness in churches
• why siblings and caregivers need focused attention
• moving beyond hello to concrete offers of help
• removing attendance barriers with thoughtful supports
• bearing one another’s burdens without expecting return
• story of a mom finding faith and joining community
• practical tools: respite nights, sibling programs, parent groups
• everyday care: meals, check-ins, groceries, transportation
• accessibility that leads to participation and shared gifts
If you want to dive deeper on your own, you can check out the indispensable-people blog or my books on Amazon called The Indispensable Kid or Gospel Accessibility and the Indispensable People
Hey, hey, my name is Tracy Coral and welcome to Indispensable People. I'm a pastor, a teacher, a missionary, a mom, a wife, and I believe that every person should have access to the gospel so that they can know Christ, grow in him, and serve him with the gifts that he has given. Over 65 million Americans have a disability. That's 15 to 20% of every community. And over 85% of those individuals do not attend church. 90% of pastors believe that they are a disability-friendly church, but only 20% of parents and families agree. Let's dive deep into hard topics, big questions, perceptions, stereotypes, and so much more. Hey and welcome to today's episode. Thank you for joining me. We are talking about some frequently asked questions, and we know that our supporters, our listeners, and readers have submitted these questions, and we know and feel like if they've asked the questions, you probably have them too. So we're gonna get after it and we're gonna answer another one of these frequently asked questions. So here it is. The question is how can you minister to the whole family? This is probably one of my most favorite questions because I know that disability ministry is not just about the individual with a disability. There is a domino effect that happens when we serve the whole family. And so we need to consider not only the parents or the caregivers that are tied to the care for the child. And this, when I say child, that parent is caregiving likely through adulthood. So that brings its own interesting set of needs. And so we don't just consider the parents though, we really need to also consider their siblings because siblings are living a life that other kids and other siblings are not when they have an individual with disabilities in their home. And so here's what we need to do. First and foremost, super easy thing to do. It doesn't cost a thing. All it takes is kindness and the love of Jesus, and that is to welcome the whole family, see who they are and build relationships with them, right? The only thing that's required is time, investment, and listening. And that is doable for all people who love Jesus because that is what Jesus would do. And so getting to know those families, taking time often, here's probably one of the number one mistakes, and I know I have made it, is you see that family hustling through and they look a little harried and you know, busy. And so it's like, okay, I can't stop them. I don't want to interrupt them. They've got enough going on. I don't want to bother them in this moment. But I'm gonna say this in the nicest way possible bother them. They need to know that they're seen. They need to know that someone cares about them. And we don't do that by leaving them be and not engaging with them. And so we need to make sure that we are engaging with them, that we are having questions, that we are checking in on them. And that, and you can say something as, I see that you are you are super busy, just want to check in, see how you're doing today. Just wanted to say hello, so glad that you're here today. Those kinds of things. And here's the deal: that's the surface level, right? So the next step in this is let's go beyond the surface. Let's just go beyond the hi, how are ya? Have a great day, so glad to see you conversation. That's important because that's you, their initial, that's the first connection. But we don't want to stop there. We want to go beyond the surface. We want to invite them to an events. And if we invite them to events, we have to make sure that there's care for their loved ones. And we want to invite them out to coffee, invite them over to your home. Say if you notice something that needs done, you say, Hey, can I can I handle that for you? Can I take that for you? And sometimes we have to be a little bit more forceful and say things like, Hey, I'm gonna do this for you, not ask, because a lot of times people don't want to accept help and they don't want to ask for help. And so sometimes we just have to insist on it in a very respectful way, of course. But we want to go beyond that surface level, really build relationships with them because that's where you see the needs, that's where you get into the connection, that's where you open the door to accessibility. And just another thought and picture from this a lot of times those families struggle to get to church on Sunday morning or Wednesday night or to an event. And it's happening because their individual is struggles with maybe transition, being in different places, maybe it's just difficult outside of the home. Maybe they are someone who elopes, which means that they wander away from their people. And so there's a multitude of reasons. If you're caring for someone who requires being fed and dressed and all that kind of stuff before you leave the house, that's an exhausting marathon before you've even gone anywhere. So all of those kinds of things make it difficult for that family to get to church. And then if we make it difficult to be at church, which means they don't feel welcomed, they don't feel seen, they don't feel included, then they're not going to go through all of that work to get their family out the door to come to church on a Sunday morning or a Wednesday night or to an event. So going beyond those basics and making sure that you're stepping into their lives. And there's a verse in Galatians that talks about bearing one another's burdens. And it is the the scripture concludes with like that's our that's our direction, that's our command, that's our purpose. And so that's what we live to do. So we get to be in one another's lives and lift one another up and encourage one another and help each other. And that is no different for people with disabilities. And here's the thing: there are they're gonna come, it's not it, it can be one-sided. And the invitation to the table in Luke 14 tells us that to reach out and and to invite others in that can't repay you, and some of these families won't be able to return what you're you're giving them, but some of them will want to, and they can, and that's their participation in the body of Christ. So I'll give you an example. A few weeks ago, we had the awesome opportunity of ministering to families at a parent support group meeting with a little Bible study. And as a part of that, an individual who had been attending our respite nights and our camp and stuff like that for about three years, his mom came to the parent Bible study. It was the first thing that she had participated in in regards to anything that we've done. And she came in saying, I don't know, I don't have a Bible, I don't know how to read it. I it's not that I don't believe in Jesus, I just don't, I don't, I don't get it, I don't know what to do, I don't have it. And so she left that night, having accepted Jesus into her heart, and we've had consistent connection with them, and they've attended church and all the things. And the last thing that she said to me is, I I want to participate, I want to be of help. And she was saying that in regards to respite night. And I looked at her and I said, Listen, respite night is your night, so I won't allow you to participate in that, but here's what else is going on at the church, and we'd love for you to be a part of that. And she jumped right in and was a part of all of those kinds of things. And so know that sometimes there will be a return, but we shouldn't expect the return. However, and I say that we shouldn't respect the return. Everybody should have the opportunity to be a part of the body of Christ and serve with the gifts and purposes that God had created them with. And so, yes, you won't see a return maybe in the same way, but being involved in being a part of the body of Christ is definitely a process and a procedure and a direction. I don't know that I would call it a procedure, but a direction that we want those families to be able to move in because we want them to operate in the gifts that God has given them for. And so those are some things to think about. I have mentioned some other things that you can do to minister to the whole family. One of the things that we do on a regular basis is a respite night. So it's a two and a half hour program where parents get to drop off their loved ones of all ages. And then the parents can go out to dinner, they can go home, take a nap, they can go grocery shopping, they can go get some ice cream or coffee or whatever they choose to do. And then we get to minister to their loved ones while they're there. So that's a great, great way to help and benefit the family. In as a part of those respite nights, it's kind of a twofold thing. We do have a sibling program so those siblings can attend so mom and dad can really have an actual break. And or sometimes the parents will use that as a special time to have with their siblings. So it it operates in a in a multitude of ways. Another thing that I already had mentioned is the parent support group, the Bible study that we do for parents. That's an incredible support. We provide care for their loved ones. We also feed them dinner. So those are less things that they have to think about on that night. And that is an incredible benefit and conversations that parents get to have in an understanding environment that's not judging them, that is there to support them and to help to guide them. Something you're gonna just think about and it's gonna sound silly because it's just kind of the norm. Treat them as you would anyone else, right? If something's going on in their family, what does the church do? Okay, someone's having surgery, we're providing meals. If you're if the if one of the individuals in the household that carries the job and helps with finances loses their job or cannot work for some reason, we help to benefit. We bring a meal, we grab some groceries, things like that to help to reach out to those family members, let them know that they are not forgotten, they have not been left behind, and that their church body is going to bear their burdens and help with them where they are in that moment. So those are some very easy everyday things that you can do as you support families. Because here's the deal: when you make it possible for an individual with disabilities to be in the church, you also make it possible for the rest of their family to be in church. And that is where the gospel becomes accessible, where God can move in the lives of his people and they can live out the purposes that he has created them for. And then we can all bring glory to God. We're gonna keep this conversation going. We're gonna make the accessible gospel available to individuals with disabilities in our churches and in our communities so that every person has the opportunity to know Christ, to grow in him, and to serve him with the gifts that he is given. If you want to dive deeper on your own, you can check out the indispensable people blog or my books on Amazon called The Indispensable Kid or Gospel Accessibility and the Indispensable People.
